Revision of _Sloth Poem_ (was once upon a time was Re: Yet another text for translation)

    NOTE: Lingwa Frakas is my first ConLang.
    Its for the purpose of _ostranenie_ -
creativity  -art -  as de-familiarization;  making the familiar strange.
    It has lotsa influences - mainly Chinese Pidgin English, Tok Pisin,
Bislama and other pidgin and creole languages
with Japanese onomatpoeia and various types of slang thrown in.

    okay... in the ConLang pidgin-in-progress called Lingwa Frakas: Mutand
Inglis Pidjin (Lingua Fracas: Mutant English Pidgin):

 Plentee sheep bleet,
     fah fud hangree,
    fah haf-hot hangree.
 Tuf watah tree wid plentee beeg rut,
     deep een watah plentee rut,
    in breez  ::soyo-soyo:: .
 An karawak jast long-taim ai-bal.

 Plentee majah ::pika-pika:: green flawah blong tree.
 Haf-hot ::wabi-wabi:: wul.
 An karawak jast long-taim ai-bal.

ORIGINAL TEXT:

>>The sheep bleats,
>>   hungry for food,
>>   hungry for warmth.
>>The sturdy mangrove,
>>   roots deep in the water,
>>   sways in the breeze.
>>And the sloth just watches.
>>
>>Great comforting leaves.
>>Warm distressed wool.
>>And the sloth just watches.
    I think only a few things need immediate explanations:

 ::  ____::  <==== onomatopoetic voice (words derived from Japanese
onomatopoeia)

 "karawak"  <=== derived from Jack Kerouac (hommage to the Kerouac line: "The
Sloth is a Chinese Poet upsidedown")
    I do not like the libel that the word "sloth" connotes (and it seems
other languages - both NatLang and ConLang - continue to slander the poor,
slow, methodical animal).
 The sloth is a survivor from the earliest days of the Age of Mammals. That
must
 count for something!


    Thanx for bearing with my revision of Lingwa Frakas...

    zHANg